Sour Sweet Love

Chapter Fifteen

                JOEY and I ignored each other for days. Life was uneventful when I secluded myself from my best friends, so the weeks that followed unraveled uneventfully. Declan and I worked on our pieces individually. I worked feverishly on mine on the days I was free.

So far, I had painted an abstract piece that made me reminiscent of the days I had once been hopeful about love. Before the cynicism and before the distaste, I had believed in something extraordinary. I wanted nothing more than to revert to those days. It was easier to be happy when you were naive.

I sat on the stood behind my canvas, examining the piece. It showed the fragility of a woman who was slowly disintegrating like glass. I was satisfied with the result despite not yet being done.

I dropped my paint brush on the canvas edge, releasing a sigh. It was late afternoon and the campus was quiet. When I left my dorm and sauntered out into the courtyards, I came face-to-face with Joey. We glanced at each other for a moment, saying nothing. "I'm so sorry!" I said when, while she said, "We can't keep—"

A small smile materialized on my face. "You go."

"I was just saying that we can't keep going on like this, Ave," she implored. "I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"I knew you would."

I released a quiet laugh. "How's Molly?"

"I was just going to meet her, actually," she explained. "Come with?"

I agreed, and we talked amongst ourselves on the walk back into campus. Molly was in study hall jotting down notes. As Joey and I approached her, she acknowledged us from afar. We sat across from her before Joey broke the silence. "So?"

Molly bit her lip. "Hey."

"You're not in a good mood," I observed, glancing at her now glowering expression.

She softened her scowl. "It's just this assignment," she lamented. "I'm not even close to done and I have a date with Declan tomorrow night."

I smiled for her. "Hey, that's great. You two are getting pretty close, aren't you?"

"Yeah," she answered curtly. "It's nice."

Joey leaned in. "Hey, Mol, you okay? You're a little pale."

Molly plastered a smile that could have fooled us if we did not know her so well. "Everything is fine," she assured unconvincingly. Something was very clearly bothering her. It was then that I spotted a purplish mark faintly forming on her skin.

"Hey, is that a hickey?" I observed, raising an eyebrow.

Molly fixed her turtleneck to hide it. "Stop that, Avery."

"Declan?" I asked, suppressing the waves of emotions coursing through me.

She disgruntled, ambiguously nodding her head.

"Hot," Joey piped. She was smiling cheekily in happiness for Molly.

We indulged in the silence that followed in the next moments. It was Molly's voice that eventually broke it. "Hey Declan," she purred, glancing at a figure behind me. I felt his presence immediately, the shadow of his body descending before my own. He brushed over to the other side of the table, dropping an innocent kiss on Molly's forehead. 

"Hey Mol."

She brought her fingers to his face squeamishly and Declan pulled away in a brash gesture laced with hesitance. Because I never pegged him to be a person afraid of public display of affection, I exchanged an incredulous glance with Joey. Something seemed wrong. Something was certainly out of the ordinary if this boy was so visibly uncomfortable around my best friend who claimed to be crazy about him.

"Didn't know you'd be joining us, Declan," Joey said.

I contributed very little to the conversation as they began to banter. Then when Joey left and Molly claimed that she had to go run errands for community service, it was just Declan and I and a terse, unnerving silence that seemed to course in torrents between us.

"Do you mind?" he asked me once our eyes met.

I glanced at him questioningly. "Mind?"

"That I'm here," he clarified. "That I'm hooking up with your best friend."

"Hooking up," I repeated, stifling a scoff. "Quite the phrasing, Declan."

"I told you, don't you remember?" An indecipherable emotion crossed his eyes. "I believe people are conquests."

"Reevaluate that thought," I warned. "Because you break her, I swear to God I will break you."

He chuckled. "Gave her a promise ring last night."

"You've known her for less than a couple of weeks," I deadpanned, gaping at him. "How are you already making promises?"

He dismissed me with a flick of the wrist and coy words. "It was more of a symbolic gesture."

"Symbolic of what?" I asked in exasperation. "You've got the girl stuck in cloud nine when you clearly don't feel the same way. Are you even interested in her, Declan?"

He bit his lip in contemplation. It was then that he cleared his throat and said, "I'm interested in a certain someone that is cynical as fuck. Then again, she would be no more than a conquest either."

I burst then. "If you use the word conquest one more time, I swear to God—"

"I'm back!" a familiar figure announced. Joey. I released a sigh as she occupied the empty space next to Declan. "Seems like I walked in on an intimate conversation, again," she said with a laugh. "Why is it that I'm always coming into these situations?"

"Nothing like that," I told her.

I began undressing him in my head. Was it betrayal to Molly that I was emotionally, or even just physically, invested in him? Everything that I could have felt for Declan was no more than a bland, superficial affair. If anything, I was drawn to him for the mystery—for the promiscuity and the innuendos—and if I claimed to anything more, it would have been a lie. Was that treason in the handbook of maintaining friendships?

He put me on edge. On a verge. Of anger. Of desire. Of that dangerous feeling in between wherein your judgement is clouded by uncertainty. He made my thoughts appear in fragments. Everything felt disjointed.

"This is kind of awkward," Joey said tersely, her eyes deflecting between Declan and I.

I glanced downward at nothingness. Then Declan cleared his throat, suggesting that I look at him. When I did, he said with raised eyebrows: "How about we go work on that art project now?" he asked me.

I raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "I thought it was a surprise."

"It is."

"Then it's a surprise, Declan," I deadpanned.

"Actually, I should be going, actually," Joey said with unease. She made her discomfort show.

"You just said actually twice," I told her pointedly.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. I'm off." Then she was gone.

"This is the part where I leave," I said to Declan, providing a brash glance in his direction. It was silent between us for a moment. And then he nodded, and that was my cue to get the hell out of there. And I did. But a part of me was counting down seconds until he called my name to stop me.

He never did.