I BELONG WITH YOU

CHAPTER 18

My uncle sips his coffee then gently puts down his mug, “you surely didn’t just come here to tell me that, especially at this hour. Your announcement could’ve waited till morning. Or better yet, you could’ve said this any other time before now. Get straight to the point young man, tell me what is really going on.”

I shut my eyes close, take a huge deep breath and speak up, albeit in a small voice, “I’m scared.” My uncle hums, urging me to go on, “I’m afraid that Bella doesn’t feel the same way I do.”

My uncle holds my eyes with his intense gaze, “you think Bella doesn’t love you?”

I nod, “yes, I feel like she has no feelings for me.”

My uncle smiles, “I believe Bella feels more than you do. You’ve got to trust that, especially if you’re been serious with you wanting to marry her.” I stare at my uncle, deep in the eyes. His gaze doesn’t waver, then he speaks, “I’m sure you didn’t tells her about it. Now,” he clears his throat, “go to her, tell her that you love her damn much and fucking propose to her.” I widen my eyes after hearing him curse. But my uncle doesn’t stop there, “we’re so damn proud of you son. This, this means a lot to us. But we’ll talk about this next time, for now though you’ve got to make that woman yours forever."


I get home at dawn, feeling so exhausted. I’ve been thinking about what my uncle told me earlier. And what his wife said to me afterwards. Freda told me that Bella loves me so much, so I have nothing to worry about. But I’m still worried, because no matter how much they tell me that Bella loves me, I can’t come to terms with it because Bella didn’t say that to me.

Freda asked me to stay but I couldn’t, my head was all over the place. Sides, I didn’t inform Bella of my whereabouts so I can’t just sleep over at Freda and pretend everything else is fine, when it’s not. I don’t even know how will my Bella react when she sees me at this hour. When I open the door to our bedroom, darkness greets me. I frown, Bella doesn’t sleep in the dark. She told me that she isn’t fond of her childhood memories of darkness, she didn’t say further than that, and I didn’t press it. But she always puts the light on when she sleeps.

I turn on the lights, but I don’t see my Bella on bed. The bed is neat as if nobody slept at all. “Bella?” I call her, making my way to the bathroom. But I come up empty. What the hell happened? Did she not sleep here?

“Lisa” I call out our helper. Walking up straight to her room, I call her, “Lisa, are you in here?”

Lisa opens the door wide for me, “come in, sir!” she steps aside for me to enter. Just when I’m about to refuse and tell her why I’m here, I see Bella on her bed.

“Bella?” I rush to where she is, “did something happen to her? Why didn’t you call me? Did you call a doctor?” silence, “Lisa! I asked you a question?”

“Don’t you dare fucking shout at her!” Bella yells from the bed. Her voice sounds like she’s been crying for a long time. “And I’m not sick!” she adds before I have a chance to  speak.

I frown upon hearing her speech, “Bella,” I call for her attention, “are you okay, love?” I ask her. But silence answers my question. I turn to Lisa, “what happened to her?” I ask her in a lower voice. Lisa motions for me to follow her outside. When I do, she takes me straight to the basement. I frown, “Lisa, I need you to tell me what is wrong with my wife not to take me to a vacated area.”

Lisa whisper shouts, “this vacated area is what made your wife mad.”

“What the hell!” I growl at her. She doesn’t even shrink, instead she opens the basement door and stop at the centre of the room. I follow her lead, and that’s when I see her pictures on the floor. My ex-wife’s pictures are scattered on the floor. Damn, I should’ve known how pregnant women behave. I can’t believe she’s jealous and mad over a dead woman. I sigh, “I should’ve burn these. I just..... I can’t believe that Bella will be jealous over this.” I shake my head as I knee over to pick the pictures up.

“Bella cried like a mad woman upon seeing this. She said you lied to her. Surely, this is not something you should take it so lightly.” Lisa speaks.

I peer at her, “what do you mean she cried? And what do you mean she said I lied to her? What are you talking about?”

Lisa shrugs her shoulder, “I think it’s best if you talk to her, when she’s calm.”

I stand from where I was, “are you sure these are what made her cry,” Lisa nods, “alright, then I need you to collect them all and burn them. I don’t want to see her cry again, over pictures.”

As I’m about to leave, Lisa stops me, “was that woman your wife?” she asks politely, I hum my answer then she goes on, “goodness, you must’ve endured a lot from her then, she’s such a bitch.”

Okay! So there are many people who think same as I do, I smile and correct Lisa, “was. She was. She’s dead.”

“Whaat?” a screech from Lisa, “what do you mean she’s dead?”

I sigh loudly, “dead as in died, killed, murdered. Whatever that suits your taste. Now, no more question I’m going to see my wife.” I walk out of the basement and hurry to Bella.

I reach to Lisa’s room and find Bella as I last left her, “honey,” I speak softly, “I’m sorry. I really am. I didn’t know the pictures could make you this mad. Please forgive me, I already spoke to Lisa, I told her to get rid of them. I’m so sorry love.”

Bella turns and look at me straight in the eyes, her face so sullen from all the crying she’s been doing, “I did not cry because of the pictures, you moron!” she speaks with so much disgust from her voice, “your lies are what made me this way. I mean how could you lie to me that bluntly? What, you thought I’d never know the truth?”

I sit beside Bella and try to calm her, “honey, you have to speak clearly so I can understand you. I don’t even know what you’re saying. What did I lie to you?”

Bella glares at me, “you son of a bitch! Even to this point you’re about to sugar-coat your lies?”

I sigh, trying to calm myself in the process of calming Bella, “Bella, you have to tell me what’s going on for me to understand. Cursing is not a solution to this.”

Bella tilts her head to the other side, “who is that woman from the pictures in the basement?” she asks quietly.

“You already know that’s my dead wife, honey.”

“What’s her name?” she asks again.

I close my eyes and open them. Then I speak, “Nyssa. Nyssa Burners.” Bella goes stiff as I mention my dead wife’s name. I try to sooth her again, “look, I’m sorry Bella, I know I should’ve told you her name from the......”

“Get out,” her voice is shaking, although I don’t know what is making her this way.

“Bella,” I try again only to make her more angry.

“I said get out!” Bella yells at me. Rage clear on her beautiful eyes. “I can’t believe I trusted you this much,” tears start falling from her eyes, “why would you do this to me?” she shakes her head, “why would you make me love you only to make fun of me?” today, I hear Bella confessing her love for me, even though it’s in a very confusing way.

“Bella,” I’m torn. I don’t know what is going on in her beautiful head. I don’t understand what she’s accusing me of. She’s left me dilemma and I can’t seem to get out of this. “Please tell me what is it? I need to know what is going on, honey.”

“It’s about your ex-wife,” I hear Lisa’s voice from a distance.

“What is it about her? She’s dead. Whatever she did....”

“How did she die?” Lisa interrupts me.

I shut my eyes before answering her, “that’s not important right.....”

“How?” she interrupts again, fearlessly this time.

I turn and glare at her, “I think this is none of your business, Lisa!” I speak in a tone that clearly says no more of this stupidity.

“You see that Lisa!” this one comes from Bella, “if he really got nothing to hide, he would’ve said the truth.”

I turn to Bella, “I’m not hiding anything from you. I’m not just ready yet to tell you how Nyssa died.”

Bella laughs bitterly, “oh yeah? How lovely of you.”

Now I’m getting irritated, “Bella, enough of this. Now, you either tell me what is going on, or you sleep on it. But no more dramas.”

Just as I’m about to stand, Lisa speaks, “your wife is alive. I came across her many times. Her and Bella know each other. In fact, we came across her two months ago in town.”

I’m still registering what Lisa told me when Bella gasps, “Oh my God! You always left and came back late. So, that was the reason, to meet with your wife?”

I stand, “okay, enough of this now,” I turn to Lisa, “I don’t know where you got these stupid ideas from, but they stop now and here. Nyssa died four years ago, in my hands,” I turn to Bella and stare at her eyes. Then I speak in a lower voice, “I killed her. I killed Nyssa after I caught her cheating on me.”

I expected Bella to scream. Give out any kind of reaction. What I did not expect was for her to laugh like a mad woman, “My God, I nearly believed you there,” then she mimics me funnily, “I killed Nyssa after I caught her cheating on me,” putting on a serious face, she glares at me, “do you take me for a fool?”


And now I’m confused, literally. I sigh, rubbing my face with both hands. “It’s been a long day,” I pause, “well, and night, for both of us,” I turn and stare at the woman I was thinking of marrying, “we’ll talk tomorrow when you’re calm.” I storm out of there before I do anything stupid. Instead of walking to our room, I walk straight to my study, a bottle of vodka in my hand.

Reaching there, I slump my so tired body to a chair and replay what happened just few minutes ago. I just can’t believe I told Bella that I killed my first wife. But what’s more frustrating is that Bella, the woman I love, who now undoubtedly loves me back, doesn’t believe me. She thinks I’m lying to her. God, this day is more shitty and it has hardly begun.


BELLA