Trials

3

"Hey what are you doing here?" Miranda asked looking him up and down. He had on jeans and a grey polo shirt.

"I just wanted to give you this Chief." Ben said handing her the white envelope.

Miranda grabbed the envelope and looked back up at him. She knew when he said chief that it was him letting her know that this wasn't a husband and wife talk, but about his job.

"It's my resignation letter." He said seriously before stepping away from the desk. She raised her eyebrows in confusion.

"Ben..." Miranda whined stopping him from leaving. "It's a 6 month suspension, why are you quitting?"

"You and I both know the reason. It's no point in me staying."

"You will not resign. I won't accept it." She demanded.

"My contract does not prohibit me to leave of my own volition." He said crossing his arms.

"Benjamin quitting and throwing in the towel is not like you." She stressed. Where was her stubborn bull headed husband. This man looked defeated.

"What do you want me to do Miranda? I'm a surgeon who can't operate. I'm being left behind. I will never be able to catch up with 6 months of non surgical hours and missed procedures. I can't take my in-service exam. Missing 6 months of a surgical residency is the same as missing 2 years of college."

"Ben you could possibly catch up."

"I would have to repeat a year over and I know you might think that it doesn't matter because I easily switched from an anesthesiologist to a surgeon but I took this serious and you had my career in your hands and you choose to hold me back and throw it away."

"I didn’t just throw it away. Please stop talking like I would end your career."

"I'm only stating facts." Ben shrugged turning to walk away.

"This is not like you to just be done." She said again.

"You lost faith in me as a surgeon, but I want you to know I lost faith in you as a wife. Everyone else understood the situation and literally said they would have done the same thing if they were me, even the advisory panel that you put together said the same thing, but you wanted to make a statement. I would have been fine if you were making a statement of reprimanding me as a resident, but you made the statement because I'm your husband. You wanted to show everyone here that you could do your job because look what I did to my husband. No special treatment, but it was never special treatment, It's worst treatment. You don't trust me in an OR and you don't trust me around patients so what the hell am I still doing here. You and I both know 6 months is not going to suddenly make you trust me again. I need to let this go because I don't want to be indifferent towards you. I love you too much to find a flaw."

"Baby I-" Miranda started as she stood. Ben looked at her intently and Miranda could see all the hurt in his eyes and it hurt her down to her core. He was genuinely hurt. She couldn't even say that he was being dramatic because honestly, she didn’t take the time to see what this would have done to his career.

She was frustrated tired and angry, maybe she really did only think about how she felt during the situation. She didn’t take what the advisory board said into consideration and that was wrong. Miranda heard all of them say that he didn't have another choice to make, so why did she choose a six month suspension and why was she amped up to fire him.

She really did need to take a self reflection because she possibly could have made a misstep.

Ben looked at her for a while as he watched Miranda in deep thought. "I thank you for my time here at Grey Sloan." Ben spoke professionally as he walked out of the door.

Miranda stood there still stunned and wracking her own mind before she wiped the tears that began to fall.

After pulling herself together Miranda walked down to Richards office. She knocked and fixed her coat before walking in.

"Hey, Dr. Webber I wanted to talk to you regarding Dr. Warren." Miranda voiced clearing her throat a little.

Judging by her words Richard knew that it wasn't a personal question. "Do you think six months was too excessive?"

"Miranda only-"

"No don't give me a young grasshopper talk like I need to figure it out on my own. If Benjamin Warren wasn't my husband and he was just a regular resident and I gave him a 6 month suspension after the same events would you have said it was over kill? I really want to know."

"Miranda the only reason you are even coming to me is because it was your husband. Had this would have been Dr. Ross or any other person and you made this call It would have been the end of discussion." Richard replied.

"Please." Miranda begged.

"It was too much." Richard answered honestly and Miranda swallowed hard.

"And as the residency director and knowledge of doing this so long, what would a 6 month suspension do to his career." Miranda whispered feeling low.

"Here I'll show you." Richard said as he began typing on his computer. Richard pulled up the hours that a 4th hear resident needed and everything that was coming up.

He showed Miranda how far he would fall behind and told her about the exams he would miss and couldn't even sit down for. "I sent Leah Murphy away from our program because she would have never met the hours she needed and fell so far behind. Ben would be in the same boat after a while when we look at his file we would have did the same thing to him that I did to Leah.

"Gosh. Why would you let me do that then?"

"Miranda I told you in the meeting that it sounded like he tried. We both know that Ben, yes he's arrogant, but he would have never open that women up if he didn’t have too.

"I thought he was trying to do the show off thing like the clipboard. That was a big turn on, but this two people died."

"Too much info." Richard said looking disgusted and holding his hand up. "It was out of his control. Yes he still should have been reprimanded but not overkill. You should tread lightly because if Catherine would have done that to me--

"And what would you have done?"

"I'm just saying, it wouldn't ended well." He said simply and Miranda bit her lip. "Well What are you going to do?"

"He uh... quit today." Miranda replied shifting on her feet.

"Warren?" He questioned shocked.

"Yes."

"Wow."

"I don't even want to put the paperwork in." Miranda whined looking up at the ceiling, taking a deep breath.

"What kind of career is he going to do now?"

"I honestly don't know we haven't been talking or sleeping in the same bed. This whole ordeal put a strain on my marriage. I don't know what to do or how to proceed. I can't take it back."

"Maybe you shouldn't interfere." Richard suggested.

"Don't interfere. Interfering is my middle name."

"He's already upset don't make it worst."

"I have to do something."

"Do you?"

"Can you stop with the one sided questions." Miranda huffed. "Tell me what to do."

"Miranda I'm telling you to do nothing."

"I can't accept that." She responded walking out.

A few days later Ben had an interview for anesthesiology at Pacific Seattle Regional Hospital. It was on the water and about 25 minutes away from Grey Sloan. They were ranked #3 compared to GSMH.

After he checked in he was shown to a conference room on the third floor. He walked in and took a seat in the brown leather chair. He waited a few moments until the door opened.

"Good afternoon, Dr. Staub is out this morning with a family emergency and my Good friend has entrusted me with his interviews this morning. I'm Dr. Christian Rogers, Chief of surgery. Here at PSRH."

Ben took in the woman. She was older than him by two year or so, maybe the same age as Owen Hunt. Her hair was curly, dark brown with lighter brown highlights. She was light skin, so he assumed she was mixed raced.

"Dr. Benjamin Warren. It's nice to meet you." He said shaking her out stretched hand.

"It's nice to meet you too. Shall we get started."

"Of course."  He smiled.

She pulled a folder from the stack and smiled looking over his credentials dating back from college to medical school.

"You did your internship and Residency at mercy west. Worked there for 4 years before the merge with Seattle Grace. Then you did 3 more years at Seattle Grace Mercy West.

"That is correct." Ben nodded.

"It also says here that you were doing a surgical residency starting at UCLA and moved to Grey Sloan Memorial. A month ago you stopped why?" She questioned and watched his eyebrows furrow. "I know that has nothing to do with anesthesia I was just curious, we can move forward if do not wish to discuss that."

"It's really a long story."

"I have time." She smiled looking at her watch. She had to admit that man in front of her was insanely handsome.

Be nodded and began to explain the whole thing, taking in her facial expression at each part.

"I'm going to be honest with you Dr. Warren that was a risk and you and I both know that you knew that. It was a risky move and if she or the baby would have survive then it wouldn't have been as much as a problem that it was. Surgeons are arrogant and we play God a lot.  But my biggest concern would have been if you stood by and did nothing."

"That's how I thought It would have been looked at regardless of the outcome."

"I'm not sure why it wasn't looked at that way, because I'm certain any doctor would have acted, because its your responsibility to the patient. We took oaths."

"Thank you." Ben breathed hearing what he thought from a professional above him, a chief.

"I would have given a 30 day suspension because it was an unauthorized surgery, but hearing what you said about her stats and the fact that she started flat lining. The woman would have died on the way to the OR and because it was a lock down there was no way to get her to the OR in time to fix that. You did what you could. That was a traumatic experience. You lost a woman and her baby, you need counseling Dr. Warren."

"I don't need- he started.

"Counseling would have been mandatory." Christian cut him off and he nodded.

"I don't think you should give up and go back to being an anesthesiologist. We have two spots available before we reach our max if you would like to finish your residency. Quite frankly I would like to see you finish your residency."

"Seriously?" Ben questioned shocked.

"No one stops being an attending anesthesiologist and goes back to school to become a resident if they're not passionate about it. I believe that you would make an excellent surgeon."

"Thank you for the opportunity. I would like to take the job." Ben smiled, besides Tuck this was the first time he smiled in a while.

"Ok, I can have you a contract drawn up in a bit. I am still requiring counseling Dr. Warren."

"I figured you were going to say that." He chuckled and she smiled at him.

"You can start as soon as tomorrow, but I know you weren't planning this so I can give you a few days."

" I just need a day to get somethings in order."

"We have new interns coming, so you can attend the orientation with them to meet the attending’s and get yourself familiarize with the facility. Then I will introduce you to your new 4th year resident class. You know more than our residents because you were at a number one teaching hospital and a level one trauma center. So I'm sure you were privy to a lot of cases. I think that you will be a great resource for them as well as them to you." She responded and then she noticed that two attending’s Dr. Felder and Dr. Singer, had entered the conference room and seemed to be trying to get her attention.

"Excuse me for a second." Christian said as she went to find out what the problem was.

"It's not diabetes," Dr. Felder informed her once she entered the other room. "We tested for all types and they all came back negative."

The two doctors once again looked at the symptoms listed on the whiteboard and made further suggestions as to what could be wrong with the patient.

"Maybe it's cirrhosis," suggested Dr. Singer. "Paramedics saw alcohol bottles in the home. She could be an alcoholic."

"The woman is a professional tennis player," Rogers asserted. "Up until a few weeks ago when she began having these symptoms, she was practicing eight hours a day. You think she worked that hard to get in shape only to destroy her liver by drinking?"

"What is it that we are missing?" She questioned and then she thought about Ben. She could use this opportunity to see him in action.

"Hold on for a second let me grab someone." Christian stated before walking back to the conference room.

"Dr. Warren come with me for a minute please. I want to ask you something."

Be nodded and stood up following her.

"I'd like for both of you to meet Dr. Benjamin Warren," Rogers stated, introducing him to the others.  This is Dr. Felder and Dr. Singer, both General surgery attending’s.

"Nice to meet you both." Ben greeted.

"I think we should get his opinion on the case." Christian told them and they nodded. Before she handed him a case file

Ben grabbed the file suddenly nervous. He  quickly scanned through it taking in the information.

"Tox screen was clean when she was admitted," Ben observed. "She's not an alcoholic. She would show more evidence of the disease if she were that far gone." After considering the patients symptoms for another moment, Ben asked, "Have you tested her for Hemochromatosis?"

"Hemochromatosis, that is extremely rare but the patient is only in her twenties and is still menstruating so there's not much of a chance of her having an iron overload." Dr. Singer stated.

"Not much of a chance and no chance at all are two different things," Ben argued. "Especially if she were putting in the amount of training she claims. It's not unusual for women to stop menstruating when they exercise excessively."

"Fatigue, joint pain, weight loss, increased urination," Ben read off the board.

He looked at Dr. Rodgers and continued, "All the symptoms fit. You should test her."

"He's right," she agreed, suddenly looking at him with a new level of respect. Thinking that this was the kind of out-of-the-box reasoning she was looking for, she turned to the other doctors and ordered, "Go run the tests."

Later that evening Ben walked into the house with food from the place down the street that they loved. After his interview he sat over Rosalind's house and they had a long discussion about life.

"Hey." Miranda smiled looking up at him.

"Hey, I got you Salmon, spinach, and rice for dinner." Ben said going to set the food on the kitchen counter.

"Thank you." She replied watching him walk and looking him up and down. She was curled up on the couch watching "Beyond the spectrum BEING TAKEN." It was a show that explored the history of supposed Alien Abductions.

"You look handsome. Why do you have on a suit?"

"I had a job interview today?" He answered truthfully.

"A job interview. Why wouldn't you tell me that?" She asked sadly.

"I just wanted to do this on my own."

"There is no own in a marriage." Miranda sighed starting to get fed up with his distance.

"I'm sorry." Ben apologized. "I was going back to being an anesthesiologist."

"Why didn't you apply at Grey Sloan?" She asked curiously.

"I don't want to work there anymore, especially with the people, I was supposed to be working with to watch them move up and I don't."

"Ben after talking with Richard I-" she started but he spoke again.

"I went in today for my interview but the department head was out so I was interviewed by the Chief of Surgery. After reading my resume, she was curious as to why I stopped my surgical residency. I explained to her what happened in full details and she offered me a job to continue my Residency."

"Huh?" Miranda asked shocked.

"I am going to finish my surgical residency at Pacific Seattle Regional Hospital."

"Ben you don't have to work there or take that job. I was thinking that you could come back."

"I would never want you to go back on your word chief." He stated and he honestly didn’t.

"Miranda." She corrected. "We are at home."

"Miranda. What kind of chief would you look like, Right? It's about your job and how you would look."

"Ben. It's not."

I already accepted the job... what's done is done."

"Okay." She dejected. "When do you start?"

"I start Thursday."

"Of this week?"

"Yes. I have to go to counseling first?" Ben sighed.

"Counseling? What for?"

"The chief believes that what happened was a traumatic experience, losing the mother and the baby despite my best efforts and that I need to talk to someone about it."

Miranda paused for a minute she didn't even think about that. That was indeed a traumatic experience.

"I think that it is a good idea to sit down and talk to someone because you never know how it effects you mentally."

"Yeah. I'm going to go and be open minded."

"Ok great, can you hand me my food."

Ben nodded and got up to go get it bringing her a fork, and water bottle as well.

"What are you watching?" He asked handing her the food.

"Beyond the spectrum BEING TAKEN." She smiled.

" Alien Abductions?"

"Yep. This one case the lady is saying that she was abducted by Aliens in the middle of the night and they took her baby while she was pregnant. So she came back to earth, not pregnant anymore and the doctors said that she had a spontaneous miscarriage."

"Don't watch that all night you'll have nightmares."

"I won't." She laughed and then watched as he started to walked away.

"You're not going to eat dinner with me?" Miranda asked confused.

"I ate at Rosalind's house. I'm tired Miranda. I really just want to lay down."

"Oh ok that's fine." Miranda said sort of happy. She was excited that he was finally getting back in the bed with her. She missed sleeping beside him at night and being wrapped up in his strong arms. She use to complain about his snoring and body heat, but now that’s what she missed the most. She noticed for the past month that she was cold at night and lonely.

After Ben took a shower, he put his pajamas on and walked into the guest room. He took all the decorative pillows off before sliding into the bed.

Miranda finished eating and threw her trash away before putting her fork in the dishwasher. She cut the light off and walked to their bedroom.

Pushing the door open she looked at the empty bed and frowned. The light was off in the bathroom so she knew he wasn't in there.

Rolling her eyes heavily, she patted her feet and walked to the guestroom.

"You're not sleeping in our bed?" Miranda asked after pushing the door open.

"Yeah, I got tired of sleeping on the couch." He stated.

"You could have got in the bed with me."

"Why would I be sleeping in the bed? The same reason I was on the couch is the same reason I'm in the guest bedroom."

"You're the one who chose to sleep on the couch." Miranda sneered.

"You were going to put me there anyway." Ben spat back.

Miranda bit her lip and rolled her eyes, he was right but still. "You don't know what I was going to do." She chastised.

"Miranda I know you."

"Whatever. Have a goodnight Benjamin Warren." She gritted walking out.

"You too Miranda Bailey."