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February 25, 2024 Sha Apartment. ~~~
I sat outside on the apartment steps patiently waiting for Sha to come home. My anxiety was through the roof and I was honestly scared to face him. Marquez had called and told me that he was on his way home and if I wanted to make things right then to meet them here. I was prepared for any outcome, because I knew mentally I wasn't right. I just want to squash shit in order to keep my kids safe.
The sound of a car pulling in caused me to lift my head up. Marquez car was parking and I stood up from the steps. I watched three car doors open and I realized that I hadn't prepared myself to see Camari. I honestly couldn't stand to see her, but for my sake I wasn't gonna start anything because I had bigger fish to fry. I walked down off the steps instantly locking eyes with Camari.
"Wassam, preciate you for coming." Marquez greeted me with dap, "I ain't tell him you were here so I don't know what he expects. Ima go in the house with Mari and y'all can just talk out here. Try to listen and not talk over each other."
Camari walked up bypassing me following her brother straight into the house. I stood on the sidewalk with both hands in my hoodie pocket. Sha was leaned against Q car not making eye contact nor conversation.
"I'm not here to beg for forgiveness. I'm not here to argue, I just want you to keep me and our kids safe. I've been dealing with a lot and honestly I know that it's better for you to be here physically to protect us. That's it...that's all I ask." I stated simply, not bothering to blurt out any smart comment.
Sha chuckled, "Protection from who? Boola? I'm not protecting you from him."
"I don't care Sha, just protect the kids at least."
"Oh fasho," He nodded, "My kids been protected, whether I'm locked up or not I got eyes on my kids."
"Then how come I was attacked the other day? If you have so many eyes on your fucking kids." I asked angrily before taking a deep breath to calm myself down.
"I said my kids, not you."
I scoffed before kicking the rocks in front of me.
"We're a package deal, okay? I don't even know why I'm here asking for your protection when you didn't even protect us when you were out. Your focus was on fucking bitches and getting high. Ask yourself how many swim lessons you've been to? Ask yourself how many daycare runs you've been on? None. If I'm not forcing you to be in their life then you wouldn't even show up." I spoke truthfully and he just stared at me.
"Ask yourself why I limit what I do. You said once before that if we aren't fucking I don't wanna be around, but I can say the same about you. If my attention is on anyone else besides you, you start back up with the bullshit. And it's no excuse because that doesn't have shit to do with the kids, but you can't expect me to be there all day everyday when I don't like being in your presence."
