You're no good for me - Negan x Reader

4.

I started the next day determined to focus on my work and expel all thoughts of Negan. At least that's what I was going to try and do. Even while shoveling horse poop all I could hear in my head was the sound of his gravelly voice. "get into those bushes over there with me." played over and over while I fought back a smile. I must look like a lunatic right now.

I tried to imagine how Rosita had described him, hair slicked back, dressed in leather from head to toe, wielding a blood-dripping, barbed wired baseball bat. The image of him didn't scare me, it aroused me, and that's what scared me. He was a horrible person, disgusting personality, but I couldn't deny that he was sexy. I couldn't possibly be the only one who thought so. He looked like he just wandered out of a romance novel. I still thought of his words to me, did he really think that I was beautiful? That shouldn't matter, he was a killer, a monster.

As much as I shouldn't want to see him again, I did. I felt ashamed with myself, what would my friends think? I already know exactly how Rosita feels. I couldn't betray her, I made up my mind that I would do my best to avoid him.

The work day was now almost halfway over and I've already successfully failed at removing him from my head. My stomach started growling so I finished up what I was doing and headed over to the dining hall, not even noticing all the people passing by. I decided to eat lunch by myself today, neither Jaime, Jasmine or Rosita were there anyways. I grabbed my food and found a bench to sit at.

I was hungry but could only pick at my food, my mind was too far away to enjoy it. All I had gotten was a turkey sandwich. I put the sandwich down and walked around, trying to clear my head. Eventually I passed the garden, and there he was plain as day. I did my absolute best not to look over at him, I find that I don't have much self control. Against my will, my eyes pointed themselves in his direction. My heart dropped, recovered, and felt like it was going to beat out of my chest. He was already staring at me, when our eyes met he shot a wink at me. I instantly jerked my head away and walked away quickly, a borderline run.

Not even sure where I was going, all I knew was that I needed to get away. Shortly I found myself at the back edge of Alexandria, the same spot that me, Jasmine and Jaime had climbed over the day before. I grabbed onto the wall and hoisted myself up. Soon enough I was on the other side. Hopefully I could find my way to the treehouse and recollect.

I picked a direction to go into, not very confident it was the correct one. A couple minutes go by and surely it was the wrong way, I should've been there by now. "Fuck." I mutter under my breath. I look around trying to find something familiar, it just looked like trees to me. I turned to the right thinking maybe its this way.

Panic started to set in as I realized I may be lost, never mind the treehouse, which way was Alexandria? I rested against a large tree to catch my breath. I closed my eyes and focused on breathing. Come on it shouldn't be too hard to find my way back. Opening my eyes, I suddenly felt something grab my arm, it's grip on me was strong. I heard it's strained gargling, smelled the stench of death. How in the hell did I not hear it? I pulled my arm back from it's grip as hard as I could, but all I managed was to fall to the ground and pull the walker on top of me.

I struggled to reach for the knife in my satchel with my free hand, but it was pinned between me and the walker. I was trying to hold back it's full weight, it's jaw snapping rotted teeth just inches away from my face. I groaned as I used every last ounce of strength in my body to push it off, to no avail the walker wouldn't budge. I started to cry, is this how I'm going to fucking die, after all this time?

no. I grunted as I fought back, I grabbed the walkers wrist with my free hand, it started to slip as it's sludge like skin started to slide right off the bone. I let go and quickly grabbed right back on, this time gripping the bloody bone of it's forearm. I swayed back and forth on my back, building momentum to swing my weight over. I was now on top of the walker, it's body bucking underneath me, still trying to get at me. I pressed my knees into it's chest to hold it down, I felt the ribs cracking beneath me. I held on to the walker's arms as I looked over for my satchel, it was too far away. If I tried to get to it the walker could just jump on my back and tear my neck apart.