Our Shot (LAMS school au)

Chapter 14: Trouble in Paradise

Alex's POV
"Why did you do that, Hamilton?" He asked me angrily after the meeting let out.

I could tell he was angry because he had used my last name. We were standing outside in the hallway, Hercules and Lafayette standing semi-awkwardly behind me.

"I was just trying to help you," I said, trying to reason with him calmly, "Washington said you have talent, Laurens, and I believe him."

He ran his hands through his hair subconsciously, looking extremely stressed. "It's John!" He said loudly, taking the people surrounding him slightly aback.

"I'm not good enough," he said, his voice beginning crack, "I'm not smart enough; I'll just embarrass myself. I'm sorry, Alex, but I can't."

At that he turned on his heel and ran away, and I was worried I had made him cry; he didn't seem like someone that would bother to hide emotion.

Laf and Hercules watched him go until he was out of sight, then turned back to me. "I didn't mean to upset him," I said earnestly, worrying they'd be mad at me, but they didn't seem to be.

"He's very shy," Hercules admitted, "He doesn't like to be in front of people at all, not to mention helping to argue a point against Jefferson."

"I'm sorry," I repeated.

"It's okay, Alexander," Lafayette interjected, "It is about time he stepped out of his comfort zone."

"I'll go talk to him," I declared, starting off in the direction he had started, leaving my roommates behind.

John's POV
I had no idea what was going on inside my head as I ran down the hallway, no idea as to where I was taking myself.

Now what have you done, I scolded myself, now you're pushing away your friends because you're afraid, like always.

I was afraid. I wanted to help Alexander, I wanted to finally be able to speak my arguments instead of writing them down.

But I wouldn't. I couldn't. And I was afraid I would never change.

Alex's POV
"Laurens! Where are you?"I yelled out in the empty hallway, hoping that no one else would be around to hear me.

Then, heeding his earlier words, I stopped my running and called out, "John!"

I waited in silence for a second, hoping the desolate halls would carry my voice far enough. Eventually a different voice came back, quieter: "I'm here, Alex."

Rushing again, I followed the echo down a different hallway until I came upon him.

He was sitting against the wall, knees up against his chest with arms wrapped around them and his chin resting on one of the caps. He was staring off into space and didn't seem to notice my arrival. His downcast eyes looked red.

"Hey," I said simply, and decided to take a seat beside him.

I slid down the wall until I softly reached the floor, sprawling my short legs out in front of me. He still didn't react. "Hey," I repeated, "Look, I'm sorry. If you aren't comfortable with being in front of everyone, it's fine. I understand, John."

He shook his head, digging his face deeper into his folded form, almost hiding his face. "It's not that," he said, the sound muffled by his knees, "I want to share my work, I want to believe that I do have talent. I want to debate, Alex! That's why I joined the club. I just can't."

"What's stopping you?" I encouraged him softly, "Why can't you."

"I can't face him."

"Who?"

"Thomas."

"Jefferson?" I asked.

"No, the train. Yes of course Jefferson, Alex."

He was silent, and I took it as my turn to speak again. "Why does he matter?"

"If he thought I was arguing with him out of spite it would only make things worse. I don't need to relive that."

"Relive what, John."

No response.

"Look," I continued, "You said you don't want to talk about him, but maybe you should. Maybe it will help."

He began to shake his head, but then stopped.

(A/N: Short chapter guys, but I already have the next one written so it'll be out soon
- Daryn 🏳️‍🌈🇺🇸