Our Shot (LAMS school au)

Chapter 35: My Last Mistakes

Alex's POV

"Please," she begged, "Stay."

She looked up at me, still clutching my hand; she seemed so desperate. It took me a second to realize what she meant by stay. "I-I don't think I can-" I stuttered but she stopped me.

"J-James doesn't care about me," she struggled with the words, looking up at me meaningfully, tears threatening to show themselves again, "I need to know that somebody does; please, Alexander. Don't say no to me."

She brought herself to her knees on the bed, while I was still standing beside it. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, her pleading eyes looking deeply into mine. John... I started in my head, but couldn't bring myself to finish the thought.

Maria took my silence for submission, and pulled me softly and gracefully onto the bed. I was silent as she layed down beneath me and as she guided myself into a position above her, straddling her waist.

I didn't leave, and I didn't stop her right at that moment.

My second mistake.

"W-what about your roommates," was all I could think to say.

"Don't worry," she whispered, seeing my worried expression, "Theo and Sarah are out tonight; they shouldn't be back for hours."

"Oh," I breathed, still partially in shock as she leant towards me and snaked her warm hands around my neck, bringing her lips dangerously close to mine.

I could feel her warm breath on my face. In her eyes, however, she looked so uncertain.

I wondered why she was so desperate to pursue another relationship; don't wounds need time to heal? The last thing I wanted to do was make a mistake and hurt her twice over. "Are you sure you want me?" I asked uncertainly, she was a year my senior after all, "Don't you want... time?"

She looked back into my eyes, and there seemed a more determined look in them this time. "I know what I'm doing," she breathed.

That worked for me. You have a boyfriend, the voice in the back of my head told me, a boyfriend who cares about you, and you care about him!

But Maria's a girl, I replied, bringing my hands up Maria's arms and them moving them down to her waist. I brought her shirt up a few inches and rested my hands on her smooth, olive skin.

John would never let you do this. It makes him uncomfortable.

What John's doesn't know won't hurt him. You're not cheating; Maria's different.

She's just a girl, it doesn't count.

With that the last though to go through my head, I closed the space between Maria and I, and I could feel her smile softly against me. My initial acceptance of her offer seemed to encourage her, and she slowly brought her hands up to my waist and grasped the hem of my t-shirt.

The feeling of her warm hands against my skin sent chills up my spin, and our lips parted for only a second as she lifted up my shirt and then tossed it who-knows-where.

I pushed her back down, but then she spun us both around until I was the one pinned. "Is this alright?" She asked me quietly.

I nodded, slightly dumbstruck at how graceful she could move us both at one time. I obviously wasn't the experienced one here. "Whatever you say," I managed.

She was above me, straddling my hips. I watched as she slowly pulled her sweater off and over her head and whipped it down to the floor.

The moonlight coming in through the window reflected off of her dark hair and skin; I realized I had been staring, and she had noticed it a long time ago.

She lowered herself back down, and grinded her hips against mine briefly before leaning down and bringing our lips together again.

We parted for a moment, and I saw a hunger in her eyes before I took the initiative and began to kiss at her neck, each time picking up the pace. When I reached her collar bone she shivered, and subconsciously I was glad I wasn't the only one who did that.

I fell back down to see what she would do next. She tied her hair up swiftly with a band she had on her wrist, and I realized happily that this was only the beginning; all the while she held that same look in her eyes that made me forget all about John.

I forgot about John.

And that was my last mistake.